[Cloud Natiion]'s diary

125668  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2009-10-08
Written: (5341 days ago)

I just don't understand why I can't let it go?
I know how different everything is now, and I know that they've moved on and probably never even think about me,
but why can't I accept that?
Why am I still desperately holding on to the thought that one day they'll turn around and say
"hey, yknow what, that one girl. She was really something. I miss her being in my life, I need to get back in touch," and everything can go back to how it was.
Okay, well maybe not exactly, but it could go back to pretty close to how it was.
Yknow, life is way too short to lose friends in such a way.
How can you go from being so close to someone you feel you can pour your secrets out and they won't judge you, just sit with you for hours listening, that you can call them all hours of the day when you're sad, walk around lost with them in the freezing cold and still have fun, to just trying to forget they ever existed?
I miss this so much it actually physically hurts, and I don't think I can take it anymore. So thing's happened and went wrong, plans dont always go how they're supposed to. But we're still supposed to be there for eachother. You know that better than anyone.
Am I seriously the only one of us that feels this is unbarable, and something is drastically wrong?
Maybe that's why I cant let it go. Anyone else have any other thoughts, please let me know.

121474  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2009-03-02
Written: (5561 days ago)
Next in thread: 123003

"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go.
Things go wrong so that you appreicate them when they're right.
You believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself.
And sometimes, good things fall apart so better things can fall together."

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