Well it's Memorial Day gotta spend it with the family. I don't mind cause most of my family is pretty cool. I actually ate breakfast today it's a miracle. I couldn't fall asleep last night I don't know why but I couldn't. I got up pretty early too just couldn't sleep anymore. I hate when that happens cause now I'm going to be tired all day long. Oh well thats life. So I dont know wether I should call Paul or not it's going to be so wierd to be around him now after Saturday night. I feel kinda guilty about doing that with him. Like what if I get a boyfriend before we start anything or what if I dont feel the same way about him or I dont know. What if something happens. I don't even know if I actually like him in that way I think it was more of a lustful thing to do. He told me that he loved me I couldn't say it back because I dont. I hate when people do that. I don't want to love anybody right now. Things get to complicated when you think that you love someone. I hope I don't hurt him. I will try not to but if I do thats life and he will get over me sooner or later. Hopefully sooner rather than later. well ta ta for now.

I get so bored at night nowadays. There is noone to talk to on my yahoo buddy list. Most people don't tlak to me because I broke up with Magan my x girlfriend like a month ago. After I broke up with her I found out who all my real friends are. I went to the skatepark yesterday it was wicked awesome. I just started skateboarding cause I use to snowboard but anyway I finally was able to drop into the half-pipe without killing myself like the one other time before. I was so happy. I'm getting good can't to be as good as a friend of mine who was sponsored by sobe. He's awesome on the half-pipe but not to good at street, of course neither am I but I will learn eventually. I miss my sister who went to the beach this weekend I wish I could have gone. I have only been to the beach once for 5 minutes at the most. I will most likely go this summer with my family and sometime me and friends will go. As soon as we find someone with a liscence willing to take us for free. I'm so damn tired right now but I know that if I go to bed I wont be able to fall asleep any time soon. I hate it when I get like this which is usually every night. I hope I passed all of my classes this year cause I dont want to have to take any classes over my senior year. It is going to be so wicked awesome being a senior where everyone knows who you are. Of course everyone knows me anyway because of my past. My reputation of a badass has gotten so bad no one will say anything when I do say something that is really wrong. I had to take senior pictures the other day they are going to come out looking stupid as hell. I had to take pictures only because my parents were making me. Other than that I normally dont have pictures taken of me. well I am extremely tired so I'm going to go. Bye

Well hello to everyone who is reading this message. This is the first time I have made a diary entry to this site. I have just joined and already I have fallen in love with it. So Saturday night my friend Paul stayed at my house. At about 2:30 I went into the room he was staying in because I couldn't sleep. We got intiment into it straight it was so hot. I sucked his cock for 10 minutes. I felt wierd afterwards because he was the first guy I have messed with since I moved here. I don't exactly know if I like him but he is really sweet. I was the first guy to ever do anything to him. When I left his room I brushed my teeth and went to go to bed. I was sleeping in my sisters bed that night. He came in and was really scared he thought that he did something to me to make me leave right after I did that. I held him for a little bit and told him that he didnt do anything. He was so frail and scared it was the sweetest thing I had ever seen. I dont know how to act around him anymore and I feel like a slut. He was so big though.